The previous management couldn't market ice cubes in the frickin' Sahara. Their promotions were pathetic. The Big Team finally bought their asses out, and brought in "the pros from Dover," Mandalay Baseball Properties, an outfit that runs minor league operations across the country and who--more importantly--are part of a Hollywood outfit, Mandalay Entertainment Group, which knows a thing or three about how to sell their products for public consumption.
The "show" opened badly, with Guy Molinari acting as MC, which immediately pissed me off. I liked Guy well enough when he was a politician, but I cannot stand seeing Guy's name or face anymore. He's making huge bank trading off his name these days--like whoring for the NASCAR racetrack proposal--and besides, where the hell had he been before the Big Team took the reins? He helped his paisan Rudy Guliani get the money to build the ballpark, and then didn't do damn near anything to help fill the joint's seats.
Whatever. After all the shucking and jiving was done, I'd decided to buy another pair of seats because, finally, they were joining the Baby Bombers to the boys in the Bronx, for those willing to take the season ticket plunge:
• Priority for Yankees playoff tickets: SI Yankees ticket holders will have priority to purchase New York Yankees playoff tickets before they become available to the public.
• New York Yankees premium game priority: SI Yankees ticket holders will have an opportunity to buy tickets to games against the Red Sox, Mets and other premium games before the general public.
• Old Timers' Game: While the Old Timers' Game in the Bronx has always been a big hit, the fans in Staten Island will be treated to their own version of the event. A second Old Timers' Game will be played in Staten Island, with season-ticket holders receiving exclusive tickets to the game. There will also be autograph sessions for ticket holders.
• Exclusive gifts: The Staten Island Yankees will choose the best giveaway the Bombers have to offer in 2007 and give it to their season-ticket holders, who will receive one gift for every ticket they purchase. Ticket holders will also receive one New York Yankees cap for each of their tickets.
THE BIGGIE! • A day at Yankee Stadium:Staten Island ticket holders will be invited to attend a Yankees game in the Bronx. The fans will be allowed into the ballpark an hour before it opens to the public, where they can watch batting practice, take a tour of Monument Park and attend an exclusive meeting with Cashman.
If these kind of perks don't draw more true Yankee fans on Staten Island to take the minor league plunge, I don't know what will.
Depending on the Yankee position in the AL East standings, and my subsequent mood on that day at the Stadium, I very well may have my Baby Bomber tickets revoked if I'm allowed close enough to Cashman to kick the little bastard in the balls.
The Retreat's typical half-assed writeup
Hey, Jay? I was one of those "hard cases," you mentioned... that crap, along with calling Mrs. Rosemary a freakin' "corporate" entity... I gotta say, if you're gonna do snark, hire me first! No member of the Fingerboard Follies has enough control of the language to pull it off. Not you, skippy, who would put Mike Siani in the football hall found in Canton (based on all your sucking up); you Fingerboard fuckwits make the NY Times look like an open air market of ideas.