I really don't know, if I had to
Because SOMEONE needs to defend our sometimes psychotic Overlord....
And Mutt fans are Assholes who need to be stomped dead in their beds
Sunday, December 30, 2007
I really don't know, if I had to
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Monday, December 17, 2007
this is your Sheffield Steel:
Note the little Red Sox Nation, finger waving tyke towards the middle. He's gonna grow to beat the shit out of Manchester United's entire fan base, and then work his way north.
Or just rule Southie like Curley never could.
I LOVE that kid.
Hot Air » Blog Archive » British Muslim woman: I need a new hymen ASAP or they’ll kill me
Saturday, December 15, 2007
I worry that not every name in the report is not a user, but how do we know which ones outside of the players who had specific evidence and testimony did it?” Schilling asked. “I mean Brian Roberts’s name was included, and I think people everywhere assume that, since he’s on the ‘list’ of names ESPN presented, he’s one of the guilty ones? If you read the report, his name was included because Larry Bigbie told the Mitchell investigators that Brian mentioned to him that he’d tried it. Is that right? I don’t think it is.
Friday, December 14, 2007
Thursday, December 13, 2007
If you’re worried about the integrity of the game then I say this: resign. The Mitchell report was done to put the steroid era behind us. With that you should go to. As my Navy buddies always tell me, “The captain goes down with the ship.” Well, Bud-a-roo, you should go off into the deep blue sea powered by that report.
“But wait, El Jefe, who should be the next Commish?”
Glad ya’ asked ‘cause here’s two proposals: an elected commissioner by BOTH the players and the owners and one selected by fans by voting online
For the player/owner proposal:
1. Each team’s owner gets a vote
2. Each team’s player rep gets a vote
The candidates could be volunteers or chosen a la jury selection. Each side has ‘x’ number of potentials and each can have a number of ‘challenges’.
For the fan voting proposal:
1. Register as a candidate with your resume and statement of work on MLB.com
2. Fans register to vote and can only vote once
Yeah, there’s holes in each but just having the owners select the commish NEVER has the best interests of the game at heart OR mind.
Giamroido, Clemens, Pettite, and....
Also, The Bergen (N.J.) Record, citing a baseball industry official, says "several" prominent Yankees will be named in the Mitchell report. The paper said the source spoke to a third party who had seen the final report.
"It's going to be a rough day in the Bronx," the paper quoted the source as saying.
I can't wait to see who is on the list; with all this third-party hearsay leaking out, it is gonna really be interesting to see if Mitchell's report actually offers harder evidence than just "according to Joe Blow...."
But if there are no Red Sox, Mitchell--a Red Sox director--will get crucified for whitewashing "his" guys while attacking the Evil Empire.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
"With Johnny Damon in left and Jason Giambi as the designated hitter, Matsui's playing time would be reduced and could be the reason he wouldn't stand in the way of a trade. In order to approve a trade, the 33-year-old, who is owed $26 million across the next two years, could seek an extension from the Giants."
I've got this niggling thought: could the whole Giant thing be a fakeout? Could the Yanks really be putting a package together featuring Matsui--instead of Melky--and one of the Golden Children (plus farmhands) to snag Yohan?
I have absolutely nothing to base this on, but I cannot believe the Yanks are just walking away from the Santana sweepstakes. I also believe, based on things I've read, that Santana will NOT waive his no-trade unless the trade lands his butt in da Bronx.
Seriously, if you're Yohan, do you want the Green Monster looming over your shoulder for half the season?
Sunday, December 09, 2007
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Sunday, December 02, 2007
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Duuude... don't even try playing baseball with Rudy. He'll eat you alive. Saying "Yankees Suck!" earns you nothing.
Seriously, how long did this jagoff write "Resident: MA" in his résumé? This guy lived in Mass for what? A dozen or so years? I do know one thing: Rudy knowswhat it means, back then, to say "1918."
Monday, November 19, 2007
"I saw Magglio play every day," Hawkins said. "What I saw was a player having an MVP year. I have no quarrel with anyone who voted for A-Rod. He also had an MVP year. But with the injuries the Tigers had and the effort and performance I saw from Magglio, there's no question he had an MVP year."
Gage uttered much the same belief.
"I went with what I saw," he said. "So many times, you have to vote off the stat sheet. I fully expected A Rod to win. He had a great year. But I saw an MVP year. There were stats to back up the impression that I came away with from the regular season."
A-Hole carried his team through a total pitching meltdown early in the season; your chump got dumped by the Indians.
The Ultimate Homers
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Federal Grand Jury Indicts Barry Bonds
You have to believe the Feds wouldn't file unless they believe they have a bullet-proof, dead-to-rights case against King Melon Head of Roidersville.
The Smoking Gun is there with the 'E-filing' indictment goodness.
FOX Sports on MSN - MLB - Sources: Rivera wants 4th year in deal:
"The Yankees remain the overwhelming favorite to retain Rivera. No other club is expected to even approach their proposal, much less top it. But Rivera, who turns 38 on Nov. 29, has instructed his agents to shop him, in part because he was angered by Hank Steinbrenner referring to his age in recent comments about the Yankees' offer, a source says. Rivera has specifically mentioned following Joe Torre to the Dodgers, and his agents also are contacting other clubs about his availability. Rivera, sources say, believes he deserves the same length of contract as Yankees catcher Jorge Posada, who is on the verge of re-signing for $52.4 million over four years, and Mets closer Billy Wagner, who received $43 million over four years after the 2005 season."
Really... go fuck a coconut. The third year was free money, and you think you deserve a fourth?
A-ROD PLEA: TAKE ME BACK PLEASE
Rodriguez made the short trip from Orlando to Tampa yesterday and met with the Steinbrenner family and Yankees officials at Legends Field where, according to Hank Steinbrenner, the soon-to-be-named AL MVP informed the club he wants No. 13 back.
“Alex, at this point, wants to be a Yankee and is willing to make sacrifices," Steinbrenner said. “Apparently he has had a change of heart so we will see. He reached out to us through a third party and it appears he wants to be a Yankee."
The Post's Vacc:
All you hear, relentlessly, is that the fan's voice doesn't matter, that it's ignored, that it's irrelevant in our sporting world.
Mostly, that's true.
Just not this time. Alex Rodriguez heard you. He felt your wrath. He absorbed your scorn. If negotiations with the Yankees head where it appears they're heading - with Rodriguez returning, with the Yankees scoring a major coup against Scott Boras, bringing A-Rod back on their terms - then you are allowed a moment to stand up and take a bow.
Take a bow? My ass! His John Hancock on a contract ain't gonna do nothing to abate the absolute contempt in which we will hold that little shit.
Understand something, A-Hole: we are not merely gonna boo you like you've never heard before; ask Reggie about having to duck coins getting hurled at you on your home field because we, who pay your fucking salary, perceive you to be an absolute douche who only cares about the money. In his case, we threw silver; you get copper, cocksucker. "Pennies from Heaven," bitch. You're gonna have to top last year's start just to make us let up a little bit.
You hear me, Slappy? You have no understanding of what kind of world of shit you are in for if you don't deliver that 27th ring this year. After this clusterfuck you and Boras made us endure, you better pray to God and hope to hell he's listening, because so help me, if there is no World Series flag getting hoisted on Opening Day 2009, in the spanking new House That Darth Boss George Bought, you're gonna need a football team of shrinks to deal with the crap we will heap on your psyche.
OH CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN says:
"Kid? Remember: you buy the ticket, you take the ride.... but Jesus Christ on a crutch, I wouldn't want to be you this winter. You might as well just get it over with and change your name to "Mea Culpa" right now and maybe the Bleacher Creatures will let you live... but not that bitch you call your wife. She's toast."
UPDATE: I said something along these lines either here, or at the other joint:
More than anything, it apparently was the very public and seemingly ironclad dismissal by Hank Steinbrenner after the opt-out that made A-Rod begin to re-think his willingness to let Boras once again dictate the direction his career would take.
"That's why he called me, to ask if Hank was serious about closing the door on him," a second person said yesterday. "From what I gathered, Boras had been telling him not to worry about what Brian Cashman was saying about the opt-out, partly because they knew they had George on their side.
"But then Alex saw the shift in power, with the Steinbrenner sons taking over, and here was Hank saying 'Goodbye, we don't want you if you don't want to be a Yankee.' Those words really messed with his mind because he really did want to be a Yankee."
NOT LIKE THE DARTH BOSS!
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
POSADA'S HEART BACK IN PERFECT PLACE
Because the heart of the team is returning, because Jorge Posada is returning, a four-year, $52 million deal all but done that will likely keep him a Yankee until the end of his career. Posada has spent his entire career elbowing his way into the public consciousness, always overshadowed by bigger names and brassier names.
Yet if you were to take a poll among the 4 million-plus who show up at Yankee Stadium every year, if you extend the vote to the millions of others who claim the Yankees as their primary baseball addiction, you will find a battalion of relieved souls this morning....
Derek Jeter may be the nominal captain of the team. Any number of flashier players have posted all manner of flashier numbers through the years. But it has always been Posada who has represented the greater angels of the Yankees' soul, bringing a daily professionalism to the ballpark that is as evident as facade in centerfield and The Bat out by the parking lot.
Cashman and Baby Boss knew that the team in Queens were going to toss an ungodly amount of money at Jorge, so backing off and offering him what he wanted, a four year deal, was really a no-brainer; they gave a similar deal to Damon, so they also knew there would be absolute hell to pay if they let Jorge get away over--in Yankee terms--chump change. They need the steady hand of Posada to help the Kiddie Korps of pitchers that are the centerpiece of Cashman's rebuilding scheme. And with A-Hole out of the equation, they desperately need Posada's bat on the right hand side of the plate.
So now all that's left is Mo, who I am currently leaning towards telling to go fuck off if he won't take what's already on the table after reading this:
Rivera has been sitting on what is believed to be a three-year, $39 million offer for the past few days. The two sides were still negotiating last night, and the deal could still be tweaked.
Rivera, who turns 38 on Nov. 29, even brought his former manager into the discussion yesterday, telling The Associated Press that he would consider a move to join Joe Torre in Los Angeles if things don't work out with the Yankees.
"The Yankees are my first option," said Rivera, who is in the Dominican Republic. "But if that is not possible, there is Joe with the Dodgers."
Mo, I love ya, but you are just as friggin' delusional as A-Hole and Boras if you believe any other team will offer you a better deal than the Yankees, especially the Dodgers. Saying you'd be willing to go over to Yankees West is the first classless thing I've ever seen you do. You've got, maybe, two years left in that arm, Mariano. It takes you a couple of months just to get your act together... that third year at $13 mill is a goddamn gift.
UPDATE: OH CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN replies:
"Kid? Remember: you buy the ticket, you take the ride.... NOW, what are we gonna do with Jeter? Mark my words, he's gonna be a Reggie without the stick."
Saturday, November 10, 2007
"We're trying to win, but it takes more than one person. We've had teams that have won and we haven't had numbers like that put up, so you don't necessarily have to have those type of numbers in order to win."
Derek Jeter says Yankees can win without A-Rod
OH CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN replies:
"Kid? Remember: you buy the ticket, you take the ride.... My locker better be ready for me when you guys move into the new digs....
"And that guy Brosius can kick A-Rod's ass."
Friday, November 09, 2007
Thursday, November 08, 2007
It’s pretty obvious which players we’re not going to trade,” the owner’s son said Wednesday, before rattling off the team’s most-prized young pitchers. “Chamberlain, Hughes and even Kennedy. Not for a position player.
People, take note of that final sentence, and then say to yourself, "Hankie has some serious Yohan Santana lust written into that statement."
Sounds like Baby learned something from Daddy Darth: "don't go berserk until you get something good in return."
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Sox: Lester, Justin Masterson and No-co for Scott Kazmir
Skanks: Combo of two (Hughes, Kennedy, Chamberlain) and The Melkman for Johan Santana
All three pitchers and Melky for Dontrelle Willes AND Miguel Cabrera
Both the Fish and the Twinkies need a CF. Makes more sense to make the Santana move with the caveat they get 72 hours to negotiate a new contract. Although, 'giving up the farm' to get both the D-train and Cabrera fills needs at pitcher and third.
Monday, November 05, 2007
"Err, no." We never gave a shit. We knew as God playing witness,
It's the rivalry that brought us George Steinbrenner versus The Elevator.
And now, it's back. After all these years.
New York Yankees-Los Angeles Dodgers.
Once again, it's must-see baseball theater.
considering his Columbia Law pedigree, I really should not be surprised that he's a total maroon, but when he wrote this: By Opting Out, Rodriguez Really Wants In
He put it in terms of uncertainty about the return of much-admired teammates, which sweetens, not sours, relationships. But his behavior makes absolutely no sense unless it was timed to precede the Girardi announcement, and that in turn makes no sense unless Rodriguez wants to be on his lineup card.He put it in terms of uncertainty about the return of much-admired teammates, which sweetens, not sours, relationships. But his behavior makes absolutely no sense unless it was timed to precede the Girardi announcement, and that in turn makes no sense unless Rodriguez wants to be on his lineup card.
Right there, in that simple sentence that prefaced that logically ridiculous paragraph, he brands himself an ass... if I heard those words come out of some mook's mouth while sitting at a bar I would have smashed him in the face even if he was six foot eight..
A-Hole couldn't give a rat's ass about Pettitte, Georgie, Girardi or Mo; for Sweet Baby Jeebus's sake, Boras had the gall to try throwing Mo under a bus!
As I said over at The DBGB, I think A-Hole and Boras screwed up by pulling the opt-out the way they did. It's obvious (at least to me) that they think they are still dealing with Darth Boss George. That crap died with Boomer's hamburger.
Those days are over. Now, it's Baby Boss, Hank, and I have a feeling he's gonna be an absolute prick when it comes to dealing with Boras and A-Hole.
If I'm Ian Kennedy, I'm worrying about my life in Pinstripes. Nothing personal, kid, but you are currently being jockeyed by The Anti-Christ. Ipso facto: Cashman might complain, but you are trade bait.
Remember, this is the Yankees. We will trade your ass in a heartbeat. If Baby Boss has learned anything from Darth Boss, it is "fuck these bastards who will not take the ride."
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
"IF THIS happens, if Brooklyn's favorite son winds up managing Brooklyn's erstwhile baseball team, there are two things I will want to know in short order: 1. Does this mean Billy Crystal trades in the interlocking “NY' for the interlocking “LA' for good now? 2. What did Joe Torre know, and when did he know it?"
This should, finally, put a stake in the heart of Uncle Joe Torre's sainthood. Negotiating with LA before they threw Grady Little under the bus was just as bush league as what Boras and A-Hole pulled.
And, if (as rumored) he brings Mattingly and Bowa along for the ride, and fails to light up the NL West, something that's always sat in the back of my mind will become clear:
It wasn't him; it was Mel Stott and Zim, working with Buck and Stick's guys. Joe was just along for the ride.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
If I am an owner, and I know that the Yankees have made it crystal clear that they will not even bother making an offer for A-Hole to remain in the Bronx after pulling his opt-out move without even talking to the team, why in Baby Jeebus's name would I throw a contract on the table with the numbers Boras has bandied about?
There are only a few teams who are in a position to afford it, and, IMO, three of them: the Yanks, Red Sox and Mets, are out of the equation.
YANKS: Baby Boss made it clear: "Fuck you, A-Hole. We were willing to pay, and you spit on us by opting out without even hearing what we had to say. DIAF."
METS: Omar isn't an asshole; he saw all the crap that swirled around A-Hole's stint in the Bronx, and he doesn't need a third baseman or shortstop. He's gonna spend his money elsewhere to trying putting his squad over the top, especially after their late season implosion.
RED SOX: What, they're gonna ditch Lowell? If they are gonna throw crazy money at anyone, he's the one RSN will demand be on the receiving end. Bringing in A-Hole would seriously screw the team's chemistry... I can't imagine Tek and A-Hole sharing a clubhouse... and it could potentially lead to Epstein and Henry getting serious death threats if they even talk about 'Slappy McBluelips' out loud if the trade-off is losing Lowell.
Of the remaining teams that could afford it, my bet would be the Halos; Vlad and A-Hole would be a helluva one/two punch. But it would be kinda interesting if nobody bites at the $30 million per year price. It would force Boras into a corner. If the bastard had waited until the Yanks had put an offer on the table and then said, "we want to test the waters," instead of pulling that stunt while the World Series was still underway, more teams would probably be willing, but after showing all of MLB that for A-Hole it's "all about me," I think a lot of owners are not gonna bother even trying to sign him.
Would you be willing to lock 20-30% of your salary to one guy who has never done shit when it's playoff time? Texas had a decent team before that moron owner signed A-Hole to that psychotic contract, and look what it got them: the cellar. The Yanks have nothing to show for taking A-Hole on; indeed, a case could be made that bringing him to the Bronx was a mistake. So unless Boras already has an owner's offer in his pocket (which would be "tampering" under MLB rules), he may have screwed the pooch and actually depressed A-Hole's price.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
If they pick Girardi, I'm renaming this joint. It will be called
and, for no real reason...
whenever I see this, I think, "they weren't a band, they were a gang."
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Sunday, October 21, 2007
now KILL THE ROX.
/Damn me to hell, but I am AL
Thursday, October 18, 2007
National Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum: Home
Not yelling at people? Just mumbling: "Fuck the Rockies".... Sheesh, this weekend is gonna Major League blow:
Steinbrenner family ties put everyone in bind
Every time I head up there, it's 'bet on it' fun. This year? Unless crazed Tribe teepee escapees are running amok, it's gonna suck
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
It's the money, the power... it BELIEVE ME JESUS is not you douchebags who never did nothing.
(yes, I'm just busting balls, but look in the mirror?
Yankee silence doesn't bode well for Joe Torre
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
On a more serious note, if you're Joe Torre, would you want to come back? I mean, the "Joba Rules" were put in place precisely because everyone was afraid Uncle Joe would burn the kid out, and he showed he was willing to do that by using the kid in a Game 3, where he had a five run lead, after not threatening to pull the kid and his team off the field during the Attack of the Bugs if the umps didn't delay the game. Really, hosing him down with Raid™ ? Twice? Why not smear the kid with Armorall during a threatened rain delay? It was bullshit.
That kinda deciding tells me he ain't gonna have anybody defending him if the decision about offering him a new contract ever makes it to the table.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Friday, October 05, 2007
It was obvious that his focus was gone.
Why wasn't Mariano warming up when Sizemore was walked in four pitches?
Why wasn't Mariano in when we were lucky enough to find ourselves with two outs (they gave us one with that silly bunt, and then that line drive to Minky was luck in itself)?
Mariano comes in, this game is already over and we're going back to NY tied up.
Now? Who knows what's going to happen?
On the other hand, maybe god doesn't want the Yankees to win. Maybe he hates the Yankees so much that he sent his plague of locusts to mess with them.
Lofton keys Indians' rout of Yankees in Game 1 - Baseball - MSNBC.com
Look, Bombers, I have so far managed to go the entire season without destroying a television; don’t make me ruin the first season like that I’ve had in fucking years by pulling that kinda shit tonight.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Monday, October 01, 2007
Next, JESUS CHRIST WANTS TO BE RENAMED "REGGIE" BUT THURMAN WON'T ALLOW IT
OH CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN replies:
"Be serious. I told Reggie in '77, "I'm gonna kill you if you don't come through." Chambliss saved his ass. Took a whole damn year for that asshole Jackson to figure out Piniella was ready to fucking kill him right there on the field."
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Friday, September 28, 2007
GO FISH! FINISH THESE BASTARDS OFF.
C'mon, TC wants to be swimming in all the beer the bastard fans of that team in Queens will owe me if they pull the ultimate FAIL! and get knocked out of the playoffs after leading their division for the whole damn year.
You twirps thought I was outta my mind making those bets at the All Star break... who's laughing now, asshats?
UPDATE: too funny
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Torre said Steinbrenner was in good shape and encouraged by the Yankees' second-half surge, although the Boss was not pleased that his club failed to clinch a playoff berth on Tuesday night against the Devil Rays. 'I said, 'How are you doing?' and he said, 'Not so good,'' Torre said.
'That's when I knew he was fine."
Monday, September 24, 2007
“When you put on a uniform in the postseason, you’re available every day,” Mussina said. “That’s just simply the way it is.”
When asked if this represented a team-wide view, Mussina said, “I am pretty sure you can take a survey, and it would be the same opinion.”
Honest answer: "I have no idea."
However, general manager Brian Cashman is entrusted to balance both the present and a future in which he wants a healthy, overpowering Chamberlain in the rotation. So as the overseer of the Joba Rules, he was hardly thrilled about Mussina’s sentiments, saying by phone last night, “Mike needs to worry about doing his job and we will do our job. “At the end of the day, we [upper management] know what we are doing.”
TC interprets Cashmanese: "Mussina, do you really want to fuck with me? STFU AND GBTW."
Hey, Moose? Here's a newsflash: You ain't necessarily needed for the 2008 rotation. Even if you go crazy hot, it might not earn you a spot. Joba already owns one of the right hand starting slots for next year. You? Two words: Bernie Williams.
You thinking dumping you would make Cash break a sweat?
UPDATE: OH CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN replies:
"An Oriole? My right hand has more honor digging through a hole in my pants. At least Reggie's unbearable bullshit won games that counted and got me some rings. That clown? He couldn't even put away that asshat Everett with a perfecto on the line... now gimme a beer, my throat's tight from all this talking."
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Screw this, I'm taking the dog for a walk.
UPDATE: RIGHT, like they'll allow me to walk out. (and "looking scared as hell being interviewed" Melky hereby earns the ultimate respect: tomorrow, I wear his shirt).
Friday, September 21, 2007
If the Mutts blow the division there are a bunch of schmucks hanging out in a bar around the corner from me that are gonna have hell to pay (and cases of beer they're gonna owe me) after the crap I put up with from them all season long.
If somehow they pull a total collapse and fail to make the playoffs (don't know if that's statistically possible, but one can hope) I may end up owning that goddamn bar!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Sunday, September 16, 2007
"It's an honor to watch the best clutch hitter in history do his thing, and the best closer in history do his thing," said Roger Clemens, who in his first start since Sept. 3 dueled Schilling to a 1-all tie before leaving after six innings. "Jeter is one of the reasons that I got up off the couch and came back."
Jeter's HR knocks Schilling off beat as Yanks edge Red Sox
(image from noMaas.org)
with the game on the line:
Bacon vs. Jeter: Red Sox FAIL.
Mo vs. Papi: Red Sox FAIL.
Yes, Jabo-san, the world is, once again, set right tonight.
Now go pray to Thurman and then off to bed.
Captain Obvious (Eric Hinske): "If you can’t get up for a Red Sox-Yankees game, you’ve got something wrong with you."
Saturday, September 15, 2007
WHERE ARE YOUR BULLPEN GODS NOW?
This is why the New York Yankees are potentially the most dangerous team in the playoffs. That six-spot they put up in the eighth inning against two of the best relievers in baseball - Hideki Okajima and Jonathan Papelbon - is proof enough that the Yankees can hit good pitching.
What are the chances they'll come up against a pitching staff similar to the Tigers of last season and get shut down again? I wouldn't bet the house on it. Anyway, that was a hard question to answer last night after they overturned a 7-2 Sox lead and took an 8-7 victory last night at Fenway.
"It certainly makes us feel better than it makes them feel bad," said Yankees manager Joe Torre. "It's great for us. We lost a tough game in Toronto. We gave a lot away tonight. I want to say it's huge with 15-16 games left on the schedule. This is where emotion kind of takes over."
If I'm the Yankees, I fly Bucky in to deliver today's lineup card.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
and now we approach the Fall, and what do you mooks do?
START FALLING BACK.
WE R IN UR REAR VIEW MIRROR
the weekend's gonna be Armeggedon
C'mon, admit it: there is nothing fucking bettah!
Sunday, September 09, 2007
He's now hit more career HRs than any other third baseman, a record he already holds among shortstops.
Really, who the hell else could anyone vote for after this "magical" season shit?
SWEET BABY JEEBUS, HE HIT ANOTHER ONE WHILE I WAS PROOFING THIS!
Anyone who still thinks he's gonna opt out is out of their ever-loving, motherfucking mind. A-hole (or as I like to call him, "Chi Chi Rodriqweez"), is Madison Avenue GOLD as long as he wears Pinstripes. He leaves, he's a clean King Rhoid who will never hit Cooperstown with the impact he'd make having his plaque wearing a Yankee cap.
Just ask Dave Winfield. "Pimary Team=Yankees" Cap=Padre
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
This season's Yankee MVP does NOT work at third base; he is squatting behind the plate. When Gator was gonna leave Wang in the game Jorge said "no way, pull him right now" because he realized what Wang means to the team. He basically ordered Torre to give the ace of their pitching staff the hook, and Uncle Joe did what he was told to do by the REAL leader of this team. The fact the Yanks are still in the playoff picture rests entirely on Jorge's rock solid shoulders, not A-Hole's gaudy numbers.
Everyone makes a big deal about A-Hole possibly walking after this season... well, the idea the Posada might not be back scares me far more than losing A-Hole.
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
Money well spent, George. Hey, at least he showed up against us in the Bronx.
Monday, September 03, 2007
Saturday, September 01, 2007
We stomp you in NY-Penn;
We stomp you in Triple A, too.
Good lord a mighty!
We're working the "youth voodoo."
WE R IN UR REAR VIEW MIRROR
LOOKING LARGER THAN WE APPEAR
I'm waiting for Cash (a la the Bruins with Bobby Orr) to just BUY some youth league (or an entire country's baseball program) that produces quality prospects.
I mean, it's not like he couldn't afford it.
Friday, August 31, 2007
The Post in Which I Prostrate Myself Before the Sage's HOF Plaque and Beg for His Benificent Forgiveness
Yankee wins give pennant race new look
If this week's kid, Ian Kennedy, strikes my fancy tomorrow in his MLB debut, my season-long betting discipline is going directly out the window.
While the sweep was probably like a swift kick to the nuts to the reactionary WEEI mouth foaming pessimist fan, many enlightened Sox fans, like myself, are not very concerned about 3 straight losses. Here are five reasons:
1.) A big division lead fosters a lackadaisical attitude to the games. You want your team heading into the playoffs hot, playing hard like somebody shoved a hot poker up your ass.
2.) As we've seen, the 2007 Yanks have shown the ability to from white hot to ice cold. Each time the Yanks have closed the division gap, they coughed it back up faster than young Jimmy getting a handy from Mary Lou.
3.) The Sox starters havent lost their ability to pitch well.... the hitters (Mostly-Manniless) were scuffling this series against decent pitching, but goodbye NYC, hello Baltimore! 'nuff said there.
4.) The complexion of those games would have changed had they occurred at Fenway (JD homer= out, 2 Cano homers- out, out, A-Rod homer= single)
5.) Even if the Yanks creep in ala Wild Card, they'll get bounced by Anaheim in the A.L.D.S. (as we ALL know)
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Hilly Kristal, Founder Of CBGB, Dies Of Cancer
Hilly Kristal, whose dank Bowery rock club CBGB served as the birthplace of the punk rock movement and a launching pad for bands like the Ramones, Blondie and the Talking Heads, has died after a battle with lung cancer, his son said Wednesday. He was 75.
Jeez, I have no idea the number of nights I spent in that dive. Good times.
“He created a club that started on a small, out-of-the-way skid row, and saw it go around the world,” said Lenny Kaye, a longtime member of the Patti Smith Group. “Everywhere you travel around the world, you saw somebody wearing a CBGB T-shirt.”
Godspeed, you Magnificent Bastard, and thanks for all the memories.
Say "hello" to Dee Dee, Johnny and Joey for me... and kick Thunders in the nuts for puking on the floor in Rock & Roll Heaven.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Time Torre throws changeup at rotation:
"A few days ago, Mike Mussina scoffed at any notion that he needed to pitch well last night to retain his spot in the rotation. 'Who would they replace me with?' Mussina asked dismissively. Three innings into a third straight disastrous start last night, you couldn't help thinking those might be remembered as famous last words from Mussina."
Melky saved him from getting yanked in the first inning. They can't DL Mussina; the league would never stand for it. The Yanks have two gaping holes in the starting rotation: Moose and Clemens. You can't--if you are honest--trust either one of them. It's Pettite, Wang, and "flip a fucking coin."
And now the Red Sox come to town.... Oh, Joy!
Saturday, August 25, 2007
By-the-by, TC: your boys are now 3 back of the Fishermen in the wildcard race. Found the panic button yet?
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Monday, August 13, 2007
He still has to answer for Kyle Farnsworth and Kei Igawa, to be sure, but Cashman doesn't look so dumb anymore, does he?
Not until Duncan's "Bash Brothers" shit breaks someone's wrist. Don't get me wrong: I love seeing that enthusiastic stuff... but he's gonna damage someone from the older part of the lineup. Melky can take it, easy; maybe even Cano. Jorge? He might end up on the DL.
Patience with prospects paying off for Bombers
“That boy hits baseballs over buildings. He runs as fast as Ty Cobb.”
— Casey Stengel
Me and the Yankees is all this guy's fault; his star overrides being born in the Bronx and a murderous intent for damn near anything to do with Queens that's coded into my genes. I'll never forget the resignation that registered on Da's face when he handed me the sliotar that he'd smacked home for the winning point in a game at Gaelic Park and I, already havving my soul stoled at the ripe age of five, immediately forged Mickey's signature on the sucker and demanded he take me to that afternoon's game at The Stadium.
PS: Costas' eulogy: "But I guess I'm here, not so much to speak for myself as to simply represent the millions of baseball-loving kids who grew up in the '50s and '60s and for whom Mickey Mantle was baseball.
"And more than that, he was a presence in our lives – a fragile hero to whom we had an emotional attachment so strong and lasting that it defied logic. Mickey often said he didn't understand it, this enduring connection and affection – for men now in their forties and fifties, otherwise perfectly sensible, who went dry in the mouth and stammered like schoolboys in the presence of Mickey Mantle."
or will always be thinking "what could have been" if his knees had held up. Kinda like Bobby Orr; if they had the luck of good health, they would have rewritten the record books. First time I met him, at his joint in Manhattan, I was, according to a friend accompanying me, "reduced to a gibbering idiot."
Nah, I just reverted to that five year old kid.
Official Mickey Mantle Web Site
Hall of Fame page
Friday, August 03, 2007
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Nearly everybody and his uncle were knocking balls over the wall last night for the Yankees. Seven Bombers effortlessly ripped eight homers, tying a franchise record from FDR's days back in 1939. You got the feeling the bat boy might have lined one off the left-field foul pole, if given half a chance during the 16-3 victory against these White Sox pitching imposters.
But Alex Rodriguez kept flying out - deep, deeper, deepest; then shallow and sharply shallow. His balls died like wounded quails out there by the warning track, where they usually take flight. He finished the night 0-for-5, sagging along on an 0-for-17 slump since his 499th homer Wednesday.
And while it is easy to feel for the guy, this may be yet another unfortunate indicator that A-Rod is still not A-Man for A-Moment. The cameras flashed. The star fizzled.
When the heat is on, it seems he's not so hot
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
"A New York man has been charged with beating his mother to death with a barbell after losing his temper while watching a baseball game on television.
Michael Anthony, 25, was watching the New York Mets lose a game on Saturday from his home in the borough of Queens when he began furiously banging on the walls, Queens District Attorney Richard Brown said in a statement on Monday.
His father Fred Fischman shouted at him to stop, but Anthony punched him in the face and threw him to the ground, according to the criminal charges.
When Anthony's mother, Maria Fischman, 61, tried to intervene, prosecutors said he stabbed her once in the head with a knife before chasing her into a bedroom where he struck her several times with the nine-kilogram barbell."
IOL: Mets fan allegedly kills mom after team lose
some assembly required.
Seriously. Eat a piece of his contract and trade him somewhere for a bucket of Extra Crispy if you have to, Cashie, but just get the SOB away from the team, or Posada and Mo might just beat the fucker to death next time he pops off like he did this past weekend.
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Cash: Hands off young arms
"Just call them The Untouchables. With the trade deadline five days away, several teams would love to pry Phil Hughes, Joba Chamberlain or Ian Kennedy away from the Yankees, but Brian Cashman has no intention of dealing any of the three.
'You can't hold them all, but certain ones, you have to,' Cashman said. 'It's what you're supposed to do - collect as much talent as you can to help yourself.'"
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
UPDATE: I stand corrected: via FARK
"Weird disclaimer of the day: #499 might actually turn out to be #500! The reason : The Yankees and the Orioles on Friday will finish a game suspended on June 28. If A-Rod homers in the last two innings of that game, and he is due up second in the first inning they will play,it will be officially credited as happening on June 28! This would technically make last nights home run #500...hope someone saved it...."
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Alright, I listen to MLB on XM nearly every day. During interleague play there are a TON of arguments about schedules being fair. Well, here’s my take:
- Go back to a balanced schedule (and balanced leagues)
- Keep interleague play but make it balanced as well
- Get rid of the divisions and go back to AL/NL
Go back to a balanced schedule. Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE that my Sox play the Skanks 19 times a year. The problem is: we play each other 19 times a year. If we went back to a balanced schedule the rivalry would just go nuclear. I believe it is a better test of a team to play everyone the same amount of times. My ‘fix’ is to play everyone in the
Keep interleague play but make it balanced as well. Now here comes the trick. You play ALL the teams from the NL 3 times. You rotate home/away every other year (i.e. Skanks play the Mutts in Queens this year and in the
Get rid of the divisions and go back to AL/NL. No more divisions. Yes, I know it ‘works’ for the NFL. However, it doesn’t work for the NBA (the closest comparison to MLB). IMAFO, with a 157 game season the top 4 teams go to the playoffs same as now. However, the shitty team in a weak division doesn’t get in. You’d have the ‘one seed’ play the ‘four seed’ and the same for the second and third seeds.
Can someone tell me why this doesn't make ANY sense?
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Monday, July 16, 2007
Monday, July 09, 2007
the blackout (when we realized what was going on, me and my friends, quite frankly, went bonkers with glee: "NO ALARMS WORK--IT'S PILLAGING TIME!);
Son of Sam (who scared the living shit out of me, because my sister was a near-perfect example of what seemed to be his demographic "target," and as it played out I was convinced the fucker was gonna cross the V-Z Bridge because Queens and Brooklyn were too hot with cops on a manhunt),
and lordy, the craziest, most absolutely flat-out insane season in Yankee history... until the following year, when, of all people, Bucky "Fucking" Dent tore the hearts out of Red Sox Nation (and reminds all Yankee fans that even though this season has been one big clusterfuck, "It ain't over till it's over!")
The Bronx is Burning
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Screw you guys, I'm in the backyard, right now, cooking me some hunks of cow (with an ear aimed at the radio, hoping Suzie finally kills Sterling if for no other reason that "just because"...).
"Hi! My Name's Bobby Abreu. I Promise You, if you hit de ball directly at me, I WILL catch de ball."
Monday, June 25, 2007
Friday, June 22, 2007
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Betances brilliant for S.I. Yanks
TO: Mandalay Baseball
RE: Joining the Evil Empire
You people just flat-out rock. I've been a season ticket holder since the Baby Bombers were born (though that first season when they were playing at CSI was a tad dicey, seeing as how CSI Security has me on what is knnown as the "keep an eye on him" list).
But good lordy, last night was a blast. The stadium looked fantastic; the weather was perfect....
And I am buying an entire season's worth of the "All You Can Eat" ticket plan, damn the gastro-intestinel aftermath!
June 21st and only ONE game over .500. You're going to have to play .666 ball the rest of the way out to even think about having a chance for the playoffs.
That said, if 'Tek goes down again you could probably stick a fork in us like last year.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
I'm biased as all get-out, but if any pitcher has put up a better season since Gator tore the league apart in 1978... hell, since I've been alive, you're gonna be hard pressed proving it to me.
And don't even try talking that Mickey Lolich shit.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Monday, June 11, 2007
Saturday, June 09, 2007
There ought to be a carnival barker stationed outside the gates off River Ave., screaming through a megaphone. Hurry, hurry, step right on up and see the bearded lady, the sword-swallowing freak, the four-horned goat.
Step right up & see Rocket!
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
i'm just kidding, the thugs probably wear those caps solely as a fashion statement, perhaps even of the leather variety, or alternate colors or some crazy splash on them... but still.
Monday, June 04, 2007
"'He was a great Yankee and a tough guy. He never talked too much but he was extremely hardworking. A wonderful third baseman, and had fire in his belly,' Yankees owner George Steinbrenner said through a spokesman."
Two outs. Two strikes. And a stud closer on the mound.
Then Papelbon attempted to close out A-Rod with a fastball that the Yankees’ cleanup hitter drove through the rain and over the right-field wall for what proved to be the game-winning hit in a pulsating 6-5 Yankees win in front of 36,793 at Fenway Park.
ALEX POPS PAP IN 9TH
Yay Yanks! Now kick some White Sox ass and maybe I'll have a reason to believe.
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Joe Torre wasn't kidding when he said this would be a circus, and the reason why the Yankees left Roger Clemens at home.
Fenway Park should have had a tent thrown over it, and not just because of the storm clouds that caused the start of last night's 9-5 Red Sox loss to the Bombers to be delayed by 30 minutes. About the only sideshows missing from this one were Zip the Pinhead, Tom Thumb, and Ula, the Painproof Rubber Girl.
Five hit batsmen, the last clearing the benches and bullpens;
princess masks and "I GOT IT!" shouts greeting A-Hole;
Torre getting Piniella-like in an umpire's face!
Yep, it's gonna be a wild weekend.
You can take the Yankees and the Red Sox out of a pennant fight. But you can't take the fight out of the Yankees and the Red Sox.
That's all. It's a law of baseball nature.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Sunday, May 27, 2007
12 and 1/2 back and it's only Memorial Day.
Heads. Will. Roll.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Monday, May 21, 2007
Sunday, May 20, 2007
TC, unless the Yankees win this year or the next, I'm afraid that for the good of the team we might need to vote Blue next time.
This one became just another loss when Joe Torre's Yankees couldn't get an out from a relief pitcher when they really needed one, the kind of out Aaron Heilman got against Derek Jeter in the top of the eighth when it was 8-6 and the Yankees had first and third with two outs and the people who had stayed at Shea felt as if they were doing what their team was doing, which meant hanging on for dear life.
Friday, May 18, 2007
"I was wrong for doing that stuff," Giambi admitted to USA Today before the Yankees played the White Sox yesterday. "What we should have done a long time ago was stand up - players, ownership, everybody - and said: 'We made a mistake.'"
We can only hope that this will, finally, make Sterling stop that ridiculous "Giambino" horseshit.
Babe only needed hot dogs, beer, and hookers to be the greatest player of all time.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Monday, May 14, 2007
Friday, May 11, 2007
Only one team with a record above .500?
Oh, yeah, that's right...KKKlemens is back. Might as well issue the WS rings on the mound at Fenway prior to his start there.
Tell DBG to give Theo a call. I hear that he can get Matt Clement on the cheap.
Better yet, call Seattle. Post-season wonder-boy (and former Yankee great) Jeff Weaver should be available.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
It's being argued that the Yankees can't let Joe Torre go because they don't have a Billy Martin drill-instructor type waiting in the wings to jolt this team out of its complacency. It may be, though, that such a veteran team doesn't need a DI—just a manager who is more of a first sergeant and less of an uncle.
I know it's near heresy, but If Uncle Joe gotta go, wouldn't Larry Bowa be the obvious choice to replace him?
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Monday, May 07, 2007
You've spent untold BILLIONS bringing back KKKlemens and now you're sending this guy down?
Sunday, May 06, 2007
IT'S "RETURN TO THE ZOO" TIME!
Someone go dig up Billy Martin.
Jesus, they have Clemens listed as a choice for "Player of the Game" and now he's yapping with Kay....
Friday, May 04, 2007
Hell, Minky even hit one out.
Things just feel like their starting to go well.
Think about this RSN, when the Rocket signs and Hughes comes back, the rotation will be Wang, Pettitte, Mussina, Hughes and Clemens. The Yankees might not lose a game in the second half.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
Kill him. Right or wrong, take his ass out and hang it on a pike.
SOMEONE gotta pay for all those hammies.
May 2, 2007 -- ARLINGTON, Texas - There's cruelty, then there's what happened last night to the Yankees. Has any 10-1 victory in the team's history seemed so depressing?
There was Phil Hughes, the franchise's future - and from what was evident last night, the present - limping from the mound, the soreness in his left hamstring overshadowing the brilliance he had displayed for 61/3 innings.
The kid was on fire; now he's on the DL. I'm starting to feel like a member of RSN pre-2004: anything that CAN go wrong, WILL go wrong.
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Of course, now he'll be joining the rest of the team on the DL.
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Saturday, April 28, 2007
How many more games do the Skanks lose before DBG loses it?
KKKlemens must be looking like this right about now...
The Yankess are a $195M last place team..owner George Steinbrenner hasn't commented on the slide.
"He won't say anything tonight. We'll see if he has anything to say tomorrow," spokesman Howard Rubenstein said.
Oh, I think I know what he'll say: "GET ME THE ROCKET ON THE PHONE NOW YOU STUPID SONS OF BITCHES!!"
Thursday, April 26, 2007
It's past time.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
So it's come to this: Hughes will be the fifth rookie to start a game this season. At that time, kids who should be down on the farm, learning, will have been thrown into this season's sausage machine for 25% of the games played. Andy friggin' Pettite is the only face Torre seems to trust coming out of the bullpen. It feels like Farnsworth has been banished to some hell dimension on Planet Torre while Vizcaino, Proctor and Bruney are vieing for the title of "first reliever to burn out before the All Star break."
Clemens has gotta be loving this.
If not for A-Hole's torrid hitting, Darth Boss George would have gone full-tilt psycho by now.
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Saturday, April 21, 2007
I get? Bupkiss.
Take your shots. Unless I know by noon, eastern, on Monday that someone besides Me, Ric, and El Jefe are playing, it ends. And I ain't happy with them.
We can play over at LeatherPenguin. I'll give access as worth it.
If they wanna. At this point I'm riding an almighty "Fuck the world."
UPDATE: still pisse at the world, but hereabouts? not so much.
Friday, April 20, 2007
Avoiding a sweep this weekend is all I ask from the Yankees. I think all the pressure is on the Sawx. Their batters are facing a pretty iffy trio of pitchers. You'd be insane to bet on Karstens or Wright handling that lineup, but stranger things have happened whenever these two teams meet. Pettite? I have no idea what Andy is gonna show up tonight. At the beginning of the season he was considered, at best, the Number Three; now he's the Number One. So if one of them can manage to win, I'll be a happy camper.
On the other side, Shilling, Beckett and Dicey have to shut down a batting order that is wicked scarier than anything they've seen so far this season. RhoidBoy seems to be getting into a groove, and having Matsui on the DL hasn't affected the offense at all. And A-Hole is sitting in the four hole, so smoking hot it's goddamn insane.
The Red Sox got to prove they can handle that lineup while the front line Yankee pitchers are not in the equation. If the Yanks manage to win two of the three games, RSN is gonna get freaked. If the Yanks somehow pull off a sweep, the Nation will go borderline mental....
If A-Hole goes bonkers and beats the crap out of Boston's top line pitchers in the process of that sweep going down, Red Sox nation will need fucking therapy. It'll be last August's "Boston Massacre" all over again. They'll all be curled up on the floor in fetal positions, sucking their thumbs and moaning "Why, God? WHY?"
UPDATE: Torre panics, blows it.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
"Fuck the Sox. I want the Mutts and I want them NOW, while the hitting and bullpen are so smoking hot it don't matter who the hell Torre hands the ball to at the beginning of the game."It's very weird. I look at the standings and see handing out a beatdown in Boston this weekend puts the Yanks in first place, and while I dig the idea, in my heart I don't really give a shit. I'd much rather see hellfire rained down on the Mutts so my next door Mutt fan neighbor has to shut the fuck up.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Friday, April 13, 2007
Saturday, April 07, 2007
While being ordered about in a Spring Cleaning frenzy I'm watching the game and saying, "oh, Jesus, Clemens is SO coming back." Then RhoidBoy jacks a three, and I'm saying, "Honey? THE LIVING ROOM IS MINE." Then comes the ninth; Cano gets on and my "Hazel" act ends. Jeter walks. I say out loud, "Oh shit, here goes A-Hole."
Wife--who had also left her cleaning behind--says "Abreu's up."
ME: "No, he'll get on. The Gods demand this comes down to A-Hole."
Abreu gets nailed on the knee and I'm all, "I told you! If he doesn't drive in at least one run he's gonna get crucified on the Easter edition back pages and there ain't enough shrinks in the city to pull him out of the boo-hole he gets buried in."
And he smacks it into the black seats. Not just over the wall; over the old wall.
Death Valley. Mantle & Reggie territory.
I cannot wait to see how the NY Posties and Daily News' crew deal with writing the headline.
I think this might be like RhoidBoy's ninth inning, in the rain slam; it might make people cut him some goddamn slack. Look, I don't like the guy, at all, as you all know. But jumping all over his shit this early doesn't do anyone good.
So maybe today gives him some breathing space... as long as he doesn't forget to "shut the fuck up and play!"
RhoidBoy rode that slam... maybe not back into everyone's heart (I still think he should be fucking indicted), but at least he showed he wasn't gonna whine; wasn't gonna cry to reporters, and realized "Do something!" is all we request if we're gonna pay the ridiculous money that finances your fat life.
I also liked that when A-Hole rounded third and was heading for home, the first two guys to greet him were Jorge and Jeter. The Old Guard. It diffused all the internecine bullshit.
Just win, baby!
The pitch was nothing remarkable: Pat Venditte, Creighton University’s temporarily right-handed pitcher, threw a fastball past a Northern Iowa batter for a called strike three. It was his next windup that evinced this young pitcher’s uniqueness and, perhaps, professional future.
As his teammates whipped the ball around the infield, Venditte smoothly, unthinkingly, removed his custom glove from his left hand and slipped it on his right. Moments later he leaned back, threw a strike left-handed to the next batter, and finished the side in order.
Throwing Batters Curves Before Throwing a Pitch
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Picture courtesy of ESPN (all staff are Red Sux fans according to nyyfans.com- those guys rule!)
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Schooled by the ROYALS?
If not for CHB acting like a tool, I'd be climbing all over Shill's performance yesterday right about now.
I thought the NY Post's Joel Sherman was the biggest douchebag sports writer; CHB proves that thought wrong.